Dear Children,

First I have to give you a compliment because it's always good to start with a positive. You are all really good at making me laugh. You're some funny kids, ev'ry one-uh you. I like that. I like that a lot.

Now, I have to say something to you.  First of all, washing clothes is not fun. I don't mind putting them in the washer, I don't mind moving them from the washer to the dryer, and heck, I don't even mind folding all the stuff out of the dryer or hanging it on hangers but for the LOVE OF ALL THAT IS GOOD AND HOLY would it be possible for you to actually put your clothes...listen up now, this is important...AWAY???

Here is a list things that you should NOT do with your clean clothes after I have washed, dried and folded them:

• put them on your bed, and then onto the floor when you go to bed for the night later on
• put them on the floor
• put them on top of your dresser
• put them on the bottom of your closet
• put them on top of your tv
• put them into the dirty clothes hamper
• shove them into a single drawer without worrying if the drawer will shut or not (*hint* it will not. Not with 4 loads of jeans and jackets shoved into it, I can promise you that)

Now there are many many more places you could put them but I assure you, if they're not put AWAY, where they go, it doesn't count. 

Another thing, if I find clean clothes that haven't even been unfolded in your hamper which has been stuffed with real dirty clothes? I will throw it away. 

Some of you may wonder where your favorite shirts are on occasion. You may have even asked me where they were and when I answered "I dunno" I wasn't lying because guess what, I don't know where the garbage man takes the garbage when he takes it out of the cans in front of my house. I don't know!  I don't. It's a true story.

One more thing. If it's not in a hamper IN the laundry room, not on the floor of the laundry room next to the hamper, it will not be washed. I will throw that away too.

Maybe when you're all down to a single outfit per person you'll remember this and think "Crap, my mom's mean" but what you should really do is remember this and think "this was totally preventable".

Love,

Mama

p.s., exempt from this are Harper and Lola, for obvious reasons. Harper, you're bordering on qualifying for this. Come July when you're 5...it's on buddy. Learn now or forever hold your peace.

(in case you were wondering, all of those places listed above as unacceptable places to throw clothes are real places my children have actually been known to stash clean clothes. For realsies. Awesome huh)