Friday, March 23, 2007

My Birthday Is Coming

I'm so old, people. You have no idea because I'm the oldest cousin/sibling/friend of everyone I know. There are pros and cons to this which I'll list now using bullets, because I'm straight gangsta:

Pros -

  • All my friends are young which makes me feel smarter
  • All of my sibs/cousins are young which makes me the boss
  • I have the most kids, which makes me the bomb
  • I have the oldest kids, which means I have built in slaves/babysitters
  • I get to die first most likely which is good because then I get to see Jesus first
Cons -

  • All of my friends are young which makes me feel ancient
  • All of my sibs/cousins are younger which makes me feel like a grandma sometimes
  • I have the most kids which makes me spend way more money
  • I have the oldest kids which means I get what Cousin Kjersten's little Spencer did seem like a mother's day song in Church
  • I get to die first which means I miss out on Disneyland trips that everyone takes while I'm dead to death
On a lighter note, I think this would look awesome for my birthday presents from you people. Feel free to browse the catalog and buy for me accordingly.

Peace out mah babies.

Friday, March 16, 2007

Gravy Boat Bonanza!

Last night as we were preparing to break bread (KFC) as a family around our dining room table (which also doubles as a dancing stage more often than not) and while we were discussing the new subtle "real potato" flavor of the mashed potatoes, Harper decided to scream. Not just a cute baby scream, but a piercing eyeball popping screech that went on for oh...about 30 seconds. We all were paralyzed with fear/shock until he stopped and smiled, then went on his way about chewing on the chicken bone we threw at him not unlike we do to our dogs. Now before you judge me on this, remember that I'm also the mother who hides behind doors to frequently jump out whooping like a yeti just to see the pure fear in my kids eyes. THAT'S JUST HOW BIG MY HEART IS PEOPLE. But, I digress.

We figured the screaming was his way of saying "Yes, while the old KFC mashed potatoes were delicious and smooth, they indeed lacked a certain, how you say... 'je ne sais quoi' that homemade mashed potatoes seem to possess. These are most delectable, and I'd love another spoonful, if you wouldn't mind". So we fed him more, which quieted his screaming, which in turn made us all happier.

And the moral of the story is:

When a child screams, it's not always about pain or anger, it could just be the simple fact that he's a born potato connoiseur.

The end.

Thursday, March 15, 2007

I hate freeways

Today I saw dead people. There was a horrible accident on the 10 between Ontario and West Covina and as I drove in to work, I heard about it on the radio. A man driving his truck with 4 kids in it went off the freeway at about 85 and wrapped them around a tree. 2 dead, 2 in critical condition. When I drove by at like 10 on my way to Cal-Poly for an engineering meeting, there were still yellow tarps covering the bodies of the man and two of the little kids who died when they were thrown out of the car. It was horrible. I was sick the rest of the day. All I could think about during the meeting was how I didn't want to drive around with my family in the car anymore, and how I didn't want to go on the freeway anymore. I was surrounded by architects and engineers and project directors bickering over if so and so forgot to put concrete pan filled stairs on the drawings back in December, and who's responsible for the 14th floor nosings and how they don't match up with what the escalator drawings said...blah blah blee blah. Needless to say, I had other things on my mind.

I hate when things like this happen, and I really hate the fear it puts in me about my kids and sweet husband. I know families are forever and all, but I still fear losing any of them. I can't imagine living without any of my sisters and brother, my cousins, aunts, uncles...and on and on. I miss ya'll and we're all still alive.

Sorry to be Miss Debbie Downer, but today was one of those days that just about broke me. Oh then I came home and ate KFC and felt like I'd swallowed rocks. I can't eat grease anymore. Alright, I'll write fun stuff latuh.

Peace, nuggas.


Here's the story

Friday, March 9, 2007

We're off to LV for the LAST TIME until forever

So Casey turned 8, and you know what that means in Mo-Land. Baptism! Anyway, we're on our way to Las Vegas for some good old fashioned family time.

Ashley, I'm glad you got a blog, you turdface. Ok, so I expect all of you cousins/sibs to blog before I get back so that I may enjoy reading them upon my return.

Also, this is our genie puppet. Jonah used to think it was the devil when he was a baby. Haha, oh man. I loooooooooooove scarin babies!

Tuesday, March 6, 2007

In San Diego We Saw A Sweet Hobo In A Denim Dress Like My Mother Shauna and Her Sister Susan Wear Every Day

Isn't this guy rad? Click to enlarge.

Thanks yo.

Gaslamp Party Time - An Update Requested By Kjersten, the hotness

Last weekend Mike and I went on a little trip to be "Alli and Mike" and not "mom and dad" for a day or 6. We ended up in San Diego after a super un-long drive, and headed out to the Gaslamp District. People. Gaslamp. Holy awesome.

First of all, there are forty BILLION people there, which can be annoying, but for Mike and I, it's entertainment of the purest (and cheapest/white trashiest) sort. We parked our butts at Croce's, this awesome restaurant with sidewalk seating and ordered. I had some kind of awesome goat cheese and walnut and field greens salad and a bowl of french onion soup so good I could have made out with it all night long. Mike got Ahi sashimi style which is basically raw, but it had this ginger stuff on it with sesame seeds and holy, it was amazing. Anyhoo, while we were enjoying our dinner, this guy in a wheelchair rode by selling gum. He was not a mexican child, so I passed. But still, this old black dude waving gum packets in the air from his wheelchair looked so awesome til it got awesomer when this youngish (25?) guy walked up with his girlfriend and started doing magic tricks for the old black crippled dude. The young guy had on a 3 piece light gray suit and a bowler hat and he was dancing around while his hippy chick girlfriend did some sweet dancing for him too. So awesome.

Next, we saw a young lass of approx. 22 aproach our vicinity in what appeared to be a handkerchief tied about her plump frame. We'll call this girl "hobag" because that's what she was. Also, she was drunk, which makes her totally awesome. Drunk hobags in snotrags, that's what life is all about.

Ok so then, this dude walked up to me with no shirt on, looking like Fabio, and in his best HulkHogan voice growled to my face "I CAN'T AFFOOOOOORD NO SHIRT!" and flexed and then walked off.

Fortunately for us, we love this garbage. Its the spice of life, not unlike Cumin is for mexicans or Oregano for the eye-talians.

Also, old people salsa dancing like they're about to eat eachother alive is sweet. You know the type, staring into eachother's eyes, making "rawr" noises at eachother, rubbin bellies together and spazmatic jerking on the dancefloor...mmmhmm...that's what I call romance.

So anyway. That's a quick update.

When ya'll comin to visit?