{ Ok, Here's The Situation (insert Fresh Prince lyrics here) }

So when I first started my first blog, "Blogger" was in beta, and nobody even knew what it was. I tried to explain it to my dad who thought it was a "chat room" and he said "stop. stop. don't even talk about it. we don't really approve of this chat room stuff you're doing or blog or whatever". Anyway. I was blogging when blogging was apparently taboo. I originally started blogging to help me journal about my 2 year journey through separation and divorce. Blogging was my place to say what I felt, even if I slipped a cuss word in there (I have a love/hate relationship with the "S" word) and it was a place of solace for me. Blogging was my best friend from 2003 until about 2006. I met many of my good friends that I have now around the country, and one of my VERY best friends and her family through online/blogging means.

The reason for this explanation? I miss blogging the REAL stuff. I miss the time when blogging wasn't a bunch of CAPITAL LETTERS thrown in with "..." and some UpPeRcAsE aNd LoWeRcAsE garbage. I'm not judging anyone, but simply stating a preference, or a pet peeve of mine if you will. You know when you find a restaurant and you love it and then EVERYONE goes there and suddenly it's too packed to enjoy, and the food starts to become mediocre and you start to find yourself hating the place for no apparent reason? That's about how I feel. I remember when my family (the Oblads and the Nelsons) used to go to St. George every 4th of July. Nobody else we knew did it, and we loved it! Pretty soon other families were joining us and it was still fun, but after a few years, other families were claiming it as their tradition, and when they'd see us there, in St. George, they'd be like "Oh, you come here too? We started this tradition a few years ago". Uh yes, we come here too. We've been coming here for 17 years. Thanks. I also remember when the Oblads and Nelsons went to Disneyland for Halloween because Nevada had the day off from school. One more thing we did waaaaaaaay back in 1979. By the mid 80's, everyone did it and we'd get the whole "oh, your family is copying our family. We've been coming here on Halloween for like 3 years". For real, Eliza and I would hear that garbage. We wanted to be like "So yeah, we know you've been coming here for 3 years, our family invited your family to come way back then". So to end this lovely rant (really, I'm saying all of this as I'm laughing, there's seriously no bitterness to it! I think it's hilarious how much it angered us back then. Now we're just like "yes! tons of people we know are here! I miss our Vegas friends and we get to see them at Disneyland!") all I'm saying is, blogging became that place where everyone was (which was super awesome) but it got diluted and competitive and fake, and I felt like I had to apologize for a "down post" or one where I wasn't all sunshine and bunnies. Basically, I felt like I couldn't be myself in my own journal.

That is the entire point of blogging folks, from the beginning. It wasn't created as a place for people to brag about how cute this is or how awesome they are or how much their cookies are better than other peoples cookies are, blogger's original platform was that they were building an "Online Journal" for people who needed it. I don't care if it's used differently, but the original purpose is now frowned upon. I just wanted to journal, and that's what I used to do. Not everything is sunshiny in your life, and not everything is rotten either. That's how journals work. I bet for all of you people who kept real journals as kids could open up to pages and see lots of times where your journal was the only place you got to tell how you really felt. Blogging isn't that anymore for me. It hasn't been ever since it became like one of those rooms where all the girls get together to compare how cute they are. So basically, my dad 7 years ago totally predicted the future. Blogging is like a chat room now.

So here's my dilemma. I am expecting my last baby. We are so thrilled you have no idea. They told us in January that there was no chance I'd carry another one and we weren't even trying and by the literal grace of God, we are getting that baby that we had just figured we'd see in another life. Anyway, I want to blog about the good, the bad, the ugly, and if I wanna say "damn it", well by jove, I'm gonna say it!

I'm wondering how you all feel. Do you feel like you can't be yourself on your blog? Be honest. Can you really say what you're feeling, or do you find that you just don't blog on those days/topics you think aren't all happy and cute? Give me some feedback on it, and if the general consensus is that I'm off my rocker and that I should just blog/journal about the wonderous things that come out of being a mother and a wife, then by golly, I'll just do that.

What I meant to say was:


Hey, I wish I could blog about myself and my real day even if it's bad! Most of my days are good, but I'd love to be able to blog about bad days too! That is all!!! Oh and once again, I am not talking about ANYONE I KNOW. So, yeah. Chee-uhl. :)

(whew! my goodness! My entire point was lost somewhere in that babbling above. I should take some classes on editing my posts into ones like the above blue part. Much less difficult to misunderstand. I hate words.)

Thanks guys.

UPDATE: I am in no way hating on anyone I know personally. Actually, I'm not hating at all. I hate those uppercase/lowercase things and that's all I hate. :) What I'm saying is that I don't care how you use your blog, talk about whatever you want! That's my point! If you wanna talk about your dog, by all means, for real, if that's "you"? Talk about your dog! For real! I'm just saying that I find that I have to "edit" what I say on my "journal". Does that seem right? I'm not judging other people's topics and posts, that's exactly what I'm saying. I don't want to be judged on my "journal". K, so now that that's clarified (I hope?)